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THAT’S THE WAY LOVE GOES: MODEL MONICA LAM

THAT’S THE WAY LOVE GOES: MODEL MONICA LAM

Love can be very confusing at times! Kaboom! Magazine wants to help you with this crazy little thing called love in the form of our sex/relationship segment entitled “That’s The Way Love Goes.” #TTWLG is where Kaboom! Magazine allows fans and viewers of our exclusive website the chance to have their questions on sex, heartbreak, relationships, and love to be answered by their favorite celebrities/entertainment personalities. Today, Kaboom! fans receive lovely advice from Model/Sales Consultant Monica Lam. The Philadelphia native is one of the hottest import models on the East Coast, using all of her curves to make every man she come across to slam on the breaks. Let’s see how Monica handles difficult situations such as computer love, nonsexual partners, love & money, and many more.

Monica M. Lam Info:
Age: 22
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Hometown: Rochester, MN
Occupation: Sales Consultant/Model
Instagram: @MonicaMLam
Twitter: @MonicaMLam
Facebook: www.facebook.com/monicamlam
Snapchat: @MonicaMLam
Personal Website: www.monicamlam.bigcartel.com
If you could have the career of one person (past or present) who would it be: Bill Gates. Why not? He’s worth well over 79.4 billion dollars and he’s the genius who co-founded Microsoft. No brainer right? (Laughs)
Does True Love exist: If you acknowledge love and allow it to grow then yes it does exist. Webster Dictionary defines “True” as Honest and “Love” as an intense feeling of deep affection. So “True Love” means an honest, intense feeling of deep affection.
You know you’re in love when….: You get the “feels.” What I mean by “feels” is when you feel every emotion in your body, mind, and soul and you don’t know how to respond let alone act. The only thing you can think about is the woman/man you fell in “love” with. You become flustered when you find yourself around the person. You become attracted to everything about this person.
Why should someone take your advice on love: I’ve been in love twice and they were 2 totally different animals. I’ve been in a horrific relationship and now I’m currently in one that is almost like a fantasy. Everyone has had their share with advice but if you’ve been in both scenarios, I feel like you’re opinion would be a bit more valuable. When I give my friends advice I don’t take a person’s side. Matter of fact I look at both perspectives of the situation, analyze the possibilities and give my utmost honest opinion. Sometimes it will hurt yes, but it’s better to be real as opposed to being fake.

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Hello Monica,
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years, we met on a night out and after a year or solid friendship we decided to take things further. In the beginning it was a bit rocky, but we sorted out our differences and it’s was great, but now it’s not. He hasn’t been working for about a year now (Was laid off from oil fields) and all the bills are being paid by my wages. I have recently had to get a better job so we don’t struggle; he has too much pride to look for a job that pays minimum wage, beside that he is a decent guy, kind, funny and sweet. I have been friends with this other guy for 4 years, he added me on fb through a mutual friend, he lives in a different county and we never met face to face, but we talk every day and he’s so sweet and always there for me. I am starting to get feelings for him and not sure what to do. I must also add that me and my boyfriend have not had sex for almost 4 months, and about 10 months ago I told him I wanted to move on but we worked through our problems. Lately I’ve been thinking about this other guy non-stop, he knows I like him and he likes me. Do I really give up a great guy going through a hard time, a man who I’ve loved for years just to start something with someone I met on social media who could be too good to be true?

Sincerely,
Ms. Computer Love

Dear Ms. Computer Love,
I’m sorry to see that you’re going through a predicament such as this but we all have to face it one day. Regarding your boyfriend not working, is it a deal breaker that he isn’t working? As a boyfriend/girlfriend, are we not supposed to support our partner when their down in the gutter? I admit that a year is long and that we should all be as supportive as we can but if I were in this situation I would not put up with it. I would do whatever I can in my power to help him find a good/decent job. I would help him figure out what is working and what isn’t in the job search. If you have helped him and he is not being proactive at all then this is up to you to figure out whether or not money is more important than your feelings. If you’re not happy then you’re not happy. A persons happiness is much more important than anything else in the world.

Now about this friend of yours, are you really going to go behind your boyfriends back to cheat on him for another man? How would you feel if he did the same to you? My definition of cheating is not just physical interactions but emotional. If you’re going to fall in love with someone else then you’re wasting your boyfriend’s time. Just because you’re not having sex with him doesn’t mean a thing. Is love really all about sex? No. Love is being there for the person you care about through the good times and bad. Love is supporting the person you care about. Love is about searching for an answer together not just giving up. If it comes to the point where you are mentally and physically exhausted in your relationship and you’ve done everything you can to keep things in place and things aren’t working out then by all means it may be time to let go. This is a very important matter and I hope you give yourself enough time to think things through.

I hope things work out and my advice somewhat helped you.

Sincerely,
Monica

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Hi Monica,
A few weeks ago, I met with a girl who is 6 years older than me. We have enjoyed our time together and hooked up several times. She had given me signs that she was looking something very serious. But for some reason, our last date went horribly wrong. We kissed each other, than she said we couldn’t hook up anymore. Her reason for this was that she didn’t want to end up hurting me later on. I know that she wants me, that kiss showed me that. Plus I love her experience in the bedroom, but she has said a few times that she hates me being younger. I need that girl, but really don’t know what to do now. Is she not telling me something? Is an age difference that important to older women even if the sex is good? and should I just forget about her and use my experience with an older woman to help me date girls around their early 20s?

Sincerely,
Missing Ms. Jones

Hi Missing Ms. Jones,
I believe that age is just a number. My boyfriend is 13 years older than I am, and though it bugs us on occasion we’ve always looked past it since our love for each other is a lot stronger than mere digits. Have you tried to sit down with her and find out why exactly why she doesn’t want to further a relationship with you? Maybe she had a bad experience with a previous relationship, or maybe she’s afraid that the age difference may bother you. Before pursuing a relationship together you should take time and get to know her and prove to her that you are worth it and you won’t run away. You should put sex aside because it shouldn’t be what’s driving you to be with this woman. Sex will eventually fade away as 2 people grow with each other and so you should learn to like her for who she is inside. I find values more attractive in a person than looks. Before having sex with my boyfriend, I fell in love with his values, his heart and soul. I felt like I was almost in sync with him. Remember, you only met her a few weeks ago, so you don’t know much about her neither. Like I said, take time and get to know the girl and if you still want her, prove to her that you are worth her time.

Sincerely,
Monica

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Hey Monica,
I need your help! I am in a loving relationship with my boyfriend of 2 years, however when I have a few drinks in my system, I strongly desire to sexually experiment with a female. I have spoken to him about it and he said he doesn’t like that I because he had another girlfriend leave him for another woman before. Now we’ve been together for 2 years and I may want to have sex with women, but that doesn’t change the fact that I only want to start a family with him. I feel so confused. I cannot disobey him as I want to end up with him in the future and get married/have a family, however I do not feel like I can go through life without sexually experimenting with a girl. I have a few friends who are lesbians in mind however I know they would not be interested in a threesome, plus I want to experience this alone without him for the first time, then work my way into threesomes. I can I control these female cravings and stay a good girl?

Sincerely,
Lady Sheets

Dear Ms. Lady Sheets,
To each their own! Respect your boyfriend’s decision and he should do the same. If you really want to experiment then explain to him how you really feel about this. Explain how you still want to be with him, marry him, and have kids but also explain how you also want to do this. He needs to understand that just because his ex-girlfriend left him for a woman doesn’t mean you will do the same. If you plan on it, then you should reassure him that you won’t leave. You live one life right? So we should be able to do whatever we want! If he’s still against it, I highly recommend that you SHOULD NOT do it behind his back as it will result into multiple arguments and a potential break up. Since you imagine him to be your future husband, which is the last thing you want. Bring it up here and there and play with the idea. You engaging the conversation won’t hurt him. The best thing to do at this point is to continue to talk about it. If he’s still against it then there is nothing you can do to change his mind.

I hope things work out, sorry if I didn’t give you the answer you wanted!

Sincerely,
Monica

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Hello Monica,
I started playing in a kickball league about a year ago and met this girl I really connected with. Soon enough we started talking on Skype/Snapchat and months after that we started texting/calling each other. After about 4 months of talking over the phone and playing kickball, I decided to plan a weekend getaway just the two of us to wine country. She gladly expected my offer and we had an incredible weekend. I was a complete gentleman the entire time, we went sky diving, wine tasting, bowling, and she didn’t have to even think about opening her wallet because I took care of everything. I didn’t even sleep in the same bed as her that entire weekend because I didn’t want her to think that I was expecting anything by paying for everything. After that weekend, we immediately went from talking every day and acting like we were almost married during the getaway, to her acting like I never even existed. She wouldn’t even talk to me during our kickball game and when she did talk to me, it was only two sentences basically cracking jokes on me. After our kickball games, we usually go hangout and have beers at one of our teammates houses. Last week, we won the league championship and had an all-out blowout bash with everyone on the team getting completely hammered. While we were at the party, I notice that the girl I just had the weekend getaway with left her phone unlocked on the table and I couldn’t help but go through it while she was wasted. I couldn’t help but oversee that she was talking to 10-15 guys arranging dates and events all paid for by the guys. It seems that she has no intention to get into a relationship with any of them only to use guys for free dates. I felt like I was used and I’ve been nothing but a pawn from the moment I started talking to her. I knew I was taking a risk getting into something serious with I just met, but I’m 25 years old and I’m at phase in my life where all my friends are getting married except me and I felt like I really could connect with her and I didn’t want to have the “What if” question stuck in the back of my mind forever so I had to try. Any suggestions on how to deal with something like this? I know it was a poor decision on my part and now that everything that happened the way it did I don’t know how to handle all the stress I feel like I’m about to have a nervous breakdown?

Sincerely,
Money Can’t Buy Me Love

Dear Mr. Gentleman,
Women and men use people every day and the people who become pawns of the game become scarred. You sound like a true gentleman and a kind person at heart. Some people who were used sometimes try to go back and hurt the person either physically or emotionally but you didn’t. You are worth so much more and clearly she lost a good person. You deserve someone who will reciprocate your feelings and actions other than throwing shade after coming back to reality. Yes you’re 25 and it’s frustrating because your closest friends have families but everyone has a different path in life. Your time will come when you meet Mrs. Right, it just means right now isn’t the time. Forget this woman and learn from this experience. Not every woman will be like her but be cautious and take your time. I don’t know what your past relationships were like but honestly only time can tell. Be patient. Like a flower, plant the seed, water it, give it sunlight, and allow it to grow. You can’t rush the growth of a flower. It’ll bloom when the time is right.

I wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors.

Sincerely,
Monica

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Hi Monica,
My boyfriend of 6 months has a “headache” whenever I want to have sex. He hates having sex with me because he says that I don’t allow him to take control in the bedroom. He is completely right, I don’t allow him to be in control during sex, because if I did, we would only be doing doggystyle the entire time. A week ago, he got drunk at a work function and he and his colleagues talked about visiting strip clubs. This led to them saying let’s go to a local strip club and he told me that he was gonna go with his boys. I told him that if he went, I would go to a friend’s house nearby as I do not want to see fat naked women who I went to high school with (I come from a small city). He called me a “Old Maid” and went to the strip club anyway. I thought coming home from a strip club would make him super horny, but all he did when he got home was took a shower and went to bed. That next morning, I made one sarcastic joke about him not wanting to have sex when he got home and he went completely crazy on me. He checked my phone and got insanely jealous saying that he didn’t want to go the strip club to look at women, he just wanted to go just wanted to go just to hang out with the guys. I told him that since he went to a strip club with his friends, I was gonna go to an all-male revenue with my girlfriend in Vegas in a few weeks. He immediately refused that idea and told me that if I went he was gonna break-up with me and kick me out on my ass. So he goes to a strip club with his boys, and I have to treat it like it’s just a regular happy hour. But I mention that I going to see male dancers with my girlfriends and you would think I was planning a murder right in front of his eyes. So why does he think different rules count for him? Should I take this personally? Do I even take his threat seriously?

Sincerely,
Stripping Stereotypes

Dear Girlfriend,
I was put in a situation like this once. My ex-boyfriend wanted to go to his boys house because there was a party and yet I wasn’t invited. It turned out his friends brought a bunch of women over and he cheated on me a number of times that night. Once he came home he started to accuse me of talking to other men when I really wasn’t. Turned out, he was insecure in himself and was afraid that I was going to find out so he put the blame on me as if I did it. You DO NOT deserve to be treated this way. A woman is not an animal nor trash. A woman is a jewel, meaning the partner should cherish it. He’s accusing you of doing things, he became insecure in himself and resorted to going through your personal belongings. At this point he has not trust in you at all. It makes me wonder, what exactly happened the night he went to the strip club? Why did he come home and flip a 180 on you? Why? Only he has the answer. Do not depend on him. You are a strong woman and though I don’t know what your financial situation is, I feel like you should move out on your own. He is not being cooperative and he is threatening you. One day he may end up kicking you out for the hell of it! That is the last thing you want. Show him you don’t need him since he’s treating you like this. Scums like him don’t deserve to be with a caring woman. You’ve only been with him for 6 months and he’s like this? Totally not worth it. I would’ve left him as soon as he called me an “Old Maid.” Your time is much more valuable than his. Take control of the situation and leave. A strong relationship is brought up by sharing “control” meaning there will be compromise. Love is not a one way street.

Sincerely,
Monica

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What’s Up Monica,
My girlfriend and I have been together for all of senior year and everything is great, except that she is always interrupting me to kiss me. For example when I’m playing video games, cooking dinner, watching a movie, chilling with friends, driving when we’re stopped at traffic lights, pretty much doing anything she insists on kissing every two minutes. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy kissing her, but it gets irritating when I can’t even have a drink of water without her coming in between the glass and my lips. I have tried to tell her to stop, particularly when I’m eating or out with friends, but not in regards to much else. I have found myself lately pulling away from her when she does this which is upsetting her. Basically I need advice on how to tell her, I love kissing her, but don’t enjoy it when it’s interrupting something I’m doing?

Sincerely,
Kiss and Tell

Dear Senior Lover,
Sounds like you’re not giving her enough attention and so she’s being attentive to you? You should sit her down and explain to her how you feel. In sales we use the Build, Break, Build method which actually helps in real life.

For example:
“Babe, I love your kisses but would you mind holding back a bit? I find it overwhelming sometimes when we’re out with friends or family, so would it be okay if we kept it to ourselves?” She may feel confused or hurt with a statement like this but reassure her that you still love her. She seems like a very fragile woman so when you are with her at home, give her the attention. Give her random kisses here and there, or drop whatever you’re doing and be affectionate to her. Acknowledge that she is there.

Sincerely,
Monica

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FOLLOW MONICA LAM ON THESE FOLLOWING SOCIAL MEDIA WEBSITES:
Instagram: @MonicaMLam
Twitter: @MonicaMLam
Facebook: www.facebook.com/monicamlam
Snapchat: @MonicaMLam
Personal Website: www.monicamlam.bigcartel.com

And that’s the way love goes! Do you have a situation in love that you need some advice with? Well allow some of our favorite celebrities or entertainment personalities to help you in the ways of love. Please email us at kaboommarketing@yahoo.com or DM us on social media using the hastag #TTWLG