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Crazy 8’s w/Comedian Renee Nicole Gauthier

Crazy 8’s w/Comedian Renee Nicole Gauthier

At the end of every day, Kaboom! Magazine trends to get a little crazy. So what we like to do is have some fun with one of our favorite celebrities, models, recording artists, or social media personalities by asking them eight of the craziest questions we can think of in our funniest feature entitled “Crazy 8”s.” Today, we get a little crazy with Elmwood Park, IL comedian/writer Renee Nicole Gauthier as she tells us all about sex under water, hiding an entire pizza in her purse, bad habits she just can’t break, and many more. Its only 8 questions, what can possibly go wrong?”….it’s Kaboom! Magazine…..so everything can go very wrong.

Renee Nicole Gauthier Info:
Age: My agent suggested that I don’t tell you because we are still waiting on that high school role we need to land. But if you need a number my Tinder page says 76-years-old.
Zodiac Sign: Virgo (said like a giant frat guy chanting)
Hometown: Elmwood Park, IL. (Otherwise known as where all the Italian Beefs in the Chicagoland live – Not a metaphor for dudes)
Occupation: Comedian/TV Writer
Instagram: @nenegooter (it’s my potential rap name and what people called me when I used to be a hip hop dancer… YUP!)
Twitter: @nenegooter (Currently holding a very exclusive and small # of followers. It’s like the Soho House of Twitter Accounts (I’m dying inside, please follow me)
Facebook: Renee Gauthier – I post only cryptic status’ about weird sicknesses and great news I can’t talk about yet.
Snapchat: @ReneeGooter (everyone spells “nene” wrong)
Personal Website: www.Reneecomedy.com (There is another, much prettier and lean yoga instructor with my name and that gorgeous asshole took ReneeGauthier.com- namaste.)
If you could have one crazy night with one person (past or present) who it would have to be…: Gilda Radner- we would go from Improv team to Improv team in every major city asking for suggestions and just ignore them and talk about how great we think the other is.
Do crazy people exist: Yeah, they call everybody else “crazy”
You know you’re crazy when…: When you start asking questions like Jeff Foxworthy. (That was a burn at the person who asked this question)
What is the craziest thing you’ve seen in the past 30 days: My face in full hair and make up- That shit looked craaaazzzzyyyyy.

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1. Would you rather relive your life up to this point, but still make all of the same mistakes or live 10 years into your future, but have no memory of how you got there?
I often dream of having amnesia so I am intrigued by this question. On one hand the heartbreak and fun I have had are such great lessons. On the other hand, people who seem oblivious to the past seem super happy. I will take the 10 years in the future.

2. What is your most embarrassing curfew story?
I once snuck out of the house in the middle of the night to go to my boyfriends (he had awful teeth). Mike went to another high school, which always seemed to be sexy no matter what kind of gross-out they were. Anyway, I snuck out wearing just a long t-shirt, it was the color peach so I thought the piece held nicely without pants… snuck out through the basement door and got caught trying to get back in the same basement door, but it was locked forcing me to knock on my backdoor at 4am on a school night. Being pantless and in trouble with your hard working, single mother is embarrassing.

3. What would you need to create a “Swagger Pill”?
I would much rather create an “Anti-Swagger Pill” swagger feels overrated and usually unfounded.

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4. Are condoms still effective when you’re having sex under water?
If you can have sex completely under water then you aren’t human. BREAKING NEWS** My friend just told me that your aren’t supposed to have sex under water anyway… ironically the water dries you out. PS she actually said “natural juices” instead of “dries out” but I didn’t wanna gross EVERYONE out.

5. Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Because sometimes when we are too beautiful we need to feel like everyone else so people will stop thinking we’re so special.

6. What is the most you’ve ever snuck into a movie theater?
A whole pizza, dude. I wrapped an entire mushroom pizza in tin foil and shoved it in my purse. Then just ate it in front of a guy who had a crush on me AND paid for my way into the movie, without offering one piece to him. That movie was “American Pie 2”. I dated that guy for a year after that. Whole Pizza.

7. What are 3 bad habits that you know you will never be able to get rid of?
A baby cough I do when I am falling asleep, Swearing in front of children, & Forgetting to register my car.

8. Who told your mother she could wear that outfit?
Don’t talk about my mom.

*Checkout Renee’s popular podcast “Dead Dad’s Club” Podcast on itunes and soundcloud. It’s candid and comedic view on comedians who have lost their fathers. Sounds weird, but surprisingly entertaining.

*Photos courtesy of Jesse Ashton Rhodes Photography

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FOLLOW RENEE GAUTHIER ON THESE FOLLOWING SOCIAL MEDIA WEBSITES:
Instagram: @nenegooter
Twitter: @nenegooter
Facebook: Renee Gauthier
Snapchat: @ReneeGooter
Personal Website: www.Reneecomedy.com